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11/6/22 4 am

Spent most of the day learning more css and then redoing my front page from scratch. ik it'd be easier to copy and paste a premade layout but I like understanding and figuring out the code! i redid the colors of the front page yesterday and i like them a lot, but i keep wanting a more pastel pink kind of layout too. might have to just create a second version and go back and forth.

things have been good. i've been really motivated to work on this site the last several days and it's keeping me busy. i've been keeping up on other stuff fairly well too. hopefully this winter won't be too bad with all the new creative projects i have planned.

my sleep schedule has been soooooo bad lately though... and daylight savings starting isn't going to help that... so i'll have to put more effort into it. it's just so hard when i don't get tired until 6 am :-\ but i seriously can't be waking up with 2 hours of sunlight left, that's going to drive me crazy. i'll work on it! hopefully these entries will start happening around 1 or 2 am instead of 4 lol

11/1/22 4:30 am

there's been a lot going on lately, and it's been so up and down it's hard to tell if I'm doing good or not. today at least was really good though. I had enough energy to clean the house and get a lot of stuff done, and then my partner and I watched Over the Garden Wall for halloween :)

I also painted my nails black and have been experimenting with eyeliner. I've finally decided to let myself try out the goth/punk style I've always dreamed of and it's so exciting. I also bought a choker necklace and I was worried it would give me sensory issues but it's been totally fine! I'm even thinking I might finally get the septum piercing I've wanted for years. I feel like I'm hitting a new period of my life, where I'm ready to actually let myself do all the things I've dreamed of for so long.

9/14/22 3:44 AM

It's raining so hard outside right now. I should be getting ready to go to bed, but all I want to do is stay up hanging out in the living room listening to the rain through the front door. I really wish I could go outside, but I'm not sure running out into a rainstorm in the middle of the night is the best idea... although, now that I say that, maybe that's silly.

Ok, I did it! And I'm glad I did. It felt so nice. I made sure I bundled up so I'm not soaking wet right before bed, but I felt the rain on my hands and jumped over puddles and honestly had a blast. Then I just sat on the porch for a while watching and listening. I love the rain so much.

It's 4:16 now. I know I should really start getting ready for bed. I've been slowly fixing my sleep schedule and getting to sleep before or slightly after 5 (as opposed to 6 or 7) but that's with getting IN bed before 4. I don't want to set my progress back... I love the feeling of late at night, but I can't keep waking up after 12 (or 2, or 3..) every single day.